This morning I went to the gym, a place I have not frequented much since becoming pregnant. I decided to use the treadmill since learning I can participate in light forms of exercise such as walking. Although there was a part of me that felt guilty that I did not walk outdoors with the dogs, I knew today was about me. I just wanted to feel a bit of normalcy return to my every day life; I hope to take Cooper and Lucy on a much-needed outing this weekend.

I charged my iPod before leaving my house. Having not listened to my iPod since moving to California twenty months ago, the song list came as a surprise. As fate would have it, the first song to play was the beginning of the track I made for my half marathon four years ago. It was as if the Universe knew I needed a sign. Yes, life is unpredictable, and at times, unfair. However, I must continue to trust and move forward because there is joy, happiness and light up ahead.  

I felt a newfound power rise in me as I walked. I even began to smile and swing my arms with each new song. I felt invigorated and empowered. Soon I began thinking about my past, in awe that I had overcome so much. I remembered how I used to lay in bed in the fetal position envisioning a better life for myself. Yet I never knew it was going to feel or be this good.

Obviously, it has not always been roses and daisies, but I have far exceeded any expectations. Therefore, I know I must believe what is still yet to come will be just as wonderful. Happiness, greatness and good health are out there waiting for me ... just as they are there for you, too.

Today, music led me on a trip down memory lane that again changed my outlook on life. It is my wish that you also find something in your day that allows you to believe in the unimaginable, hold onto hope and trust that the pain and sadness will dissipate.

Believing in Miracles,

Nicole Hemmenway

            Author of “No, It Is NOT In My Head: The Journey of a Chronic Pain Survivor from Wheelchair to Marathon”